Brian and I watch a lot of TV. In fact, the majority of our post-work hours are spent on the couch catching up on our favorite shows or perusing random movies and documentaries on Netflix.
This may seem like a big, fat waste of our precious free time when we could be committing ourselves to being productive and checking items off our vast and varied daily domestic to-do list: paying bills, mopping floors, folding laundry, cleaning toilets...but who wants to do that after a long, laborious day at work?
I don't know about you, but I need my rest. My brain needs a break from the worries and cares of my life, so I can focus on the lives of my fictional friends (shout out to Liz Lemon)!
Brian's drug of choice for unwinding after a long work day used to be playing computer games and only that. When we moved in together though, we soon realized that he needed to hop on my TV-watching bandwagon pronto because that would be our only means of spending quality time with each other during the week. That and walking Gordon together, of course.
God knows that was a more realistic solution than getting me to become a gamer. I mean...common.
Although I have not morphed into the Call of Duty playing, dragon slaying gamer girl of his dreams, I think Brian would agree that I have been pretty awesome about keeping an open mind to his TV series selections.
Who would have thought I'd become a die-hard Dexter fanatic? A zealous, zombie apocalypse-obsessed Walking Dead devotee, or even an Archer enthusiast? Although the Archer thing is more about the deal we worked out in which Brian must give me unlimited back scratches throughout the duration of that screwball cartoon comedy.
Looking forward to watching those shows every week has played an integral part of building the everlasting bond between Brian and I. Sharing the shock and laughter that lasts beyond the actual episodes and injects itself into our daily lives through our inside jokes connects us just as much as any other activity we partake in together and make memories from.
Of course, I still need my mindless Monday nights spent watching The Bachelor with my buddies, Sarah and Lauren, and Brian still needs to blow off steam by blowing up imaginary things on his computer screen.
But, there's something so special and satisfying about Brian and I sharing the suspense of what will happen on the next season of Dexter, whether the walkers will finally overtake Rick Grimes and his bad ass band of survivors, if Liz Lemon can ever successfully tame the incessant insanity of Jenna Maroney and Tracy Jordan under the watchful eye of her mentor, Jack Donaghy.
These characters have been inextricably weaved into the fabric of our lives, bringing Brian and I closer through their fascinating, albeit fictional stories. And for that, I am forever grateful.
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Monday, January 21, 2013
FAQs: "So, How's Married Life?"
Getting married has arguably been the most significant and newsworthy event in my life recently. Because of this, the question I most frequently get asked by friends, family, coworkers and acquaintances when we're shooting the shit and getting caught up is, "So, how's married life?" usually followed up by, "Is it any different than your life before?"
Well, after almost six months of marriage and a careful compare/contrast analysis of our relationship before and after the wedding, my answer is, "Being married is different, and I love it!"
Of course, this may not be the case for all the recently, happily married folks, but I feel like our relationship has become more compassionate and more caring. We're sweeter to each other, perhaps because we made a promise to ourselves (in the eyes of the almighty law) to spend the rest of our lives together and being assholes at this point would most likely make for a very miserable marriage. I think we are also sweeter to each other because now that we're married, our relationship is way more relaxed.
I'm more independent, less insecure, and Brian's more communicative and less distant. Most of our arguments pre-marriage were based on my belief that Bri didn't want to spend enough time with me, but now that I know for sure he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, I'm free from that insecurity. Which means I'm free to spend more time with friends when Bri's not in tow. I'm free to spend a weekend in the valley catching up with my parents. I'm free to pursue my own passions and hobbies and then share all of my separate experiences with Brian and vice versa - enriching our lives together by having lives of our own.
I think at this point, especially after planning a wedding together (which was absolutely and unexpectedly one of the most challenging things we've been through as a couple), we've really grown to appreciate and even try to embody the qualities we love about one another. I really am in awe of Brian's intelligence, ingenuity and can-do-anything attitude, and those qualities in him are endlessly attractive and endlessly intriguing to me.
So, now that we're almost half a year into our marriage, I can wholeheartedly say that I have never been happier in our relationship than now, and I only hope the sentiment stays with both of us in good times and in bad for as long as we both shall live.
Well, after almost six months of marriage and a careful compare/contrast analysis of our relationship before and after the wedding, my answer is, "Being married is different, and I love it!"
Of course, this may not be the case for all the recently, happily married folks, but I feel like our relationship has become more compassionate and more caring. We're sweeter to each other, perhaps because we made a promise to ourselves (in the eyes of the almighty law) to spend the rest of our lives together and being assholes at this point would most likely make for a very miserable marriage. I think we are also sweeter to each other because now that we're married, our relationship is way more relaxed.
I'm more independent, less insecure, and Brian's more communicative and less distant. Most of our arguments pre-marriage were based on my belief that Bri didn't want to spend enough time with me, but now that I know for sure he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, I'm free from that insecurity. Which means I'm free to spend more time with friends when Bri's not in tow. I'm free to spend a weekend in the valley catching up with my parents. I'm free to pursue my own passions and hobbies and then share all of my separate experiences with Brian and vice versa - enriching our lives together by having lives of our own.
I think at this point, especially after planning a wedding together (which was absolutely and unexpectedly one of the most challenging things we've been through as a couple), we've really grown to appreciate and even try to embody the qualities we love about one another. I really am in awe of Brian's intelligence, ingenuity and can-do-anything attitude, and those qualities in him are endlessly attractive and endlessly intriguing to me.
So, now that we're almost half a year into our marriage, I can wholeheartedly say that I have never been happier in our relationship than now, and I only hope the sentiment stays with both of us in good times and in bad for as long as we both shall live.
The Couple Who Gets Sick Together, Sticks Together
Over 100-degree fevers, chills, muscle aches and pains, runny noses, hacking coughs - just another night at the Johnson's!
Pretty much like everyone else in the country, Brian and I came down with the flu a few weeks back. Actually, after giving me a healthy dose of TLC (in between a little indoor shooting here and a little gaming there), the sickness struck Brian too. To add to his misery, the lucky guy got it while he was away in Orlando for work.
Even though we were at our shittiest (looking and feeling), sharing the flu had the strange affect of creating a deeper sense of intimacy between us. Besides the waiting on each other and spending the majority of our time together while we avoided the outside world, there's something about seeing one another at our grossest - snot and sweat pouring everywhere - that allowed us to experience what love and marriage are all about: taking care of your sweetie when they're at their most vulnerable.
Yes, we were basically zombies most of the time - pretty much only able to sit on our asses and watch an endless stream of television while blowing our noses and coughing up our lungs - but that's something I can't do even with my closest friends.
My mom always says absence makes the heart grow fonder (a saying that sounds like nails on a chalkboard to me after hearing it millions of times), but the fact that Brian was away for almost three days while we had the flu made my heart ache as much as the rest of my body. I was lonely (except for the loyal and loving companionship of my beloved beagle) and depressed.
And to top things off, the power went out while Brian was gone...just my luck. Okay, it was only for a total of 30 minutes when I got home from work, but really there's nothing lonelier than being by yourself in the dark. Needless to say, when Brian came home to me and Gordon, stuffy nose, sore throat and all, I couldn't have been happier - I would have jumped on him if I could!
I used to want to be left alone when I was feeling my worst, but now part of the recovery process for me is spending time with the hubby. Well, that and NyQuil...lots and lots of NyQuil.
Pretty much like everyone else in the country, Brian and I came down with the flu a few weeks back. Actually, after giving me a healthy dose of TLC (in between a little indoor shooting here and a little gaming there), the sickness struck Brian too. To add to his misery, the lucky guy got it while he was away in Orlando for work.
Even though we were at our shittiest (looking and feeling), sharing the flu had the strange affect of creating a deeper sense of intimacy between us. Besides the waiting on each other and spending the majority of our time together while we avoided the outside world, there's something about seeing one another at our grossest - snot and sweat pouring everywhere - that allowed us to experience what love and marriage are all about: taking care of your sweetie when they're at their most vulnerable.
Yes, we were basically zombies most of the time - pretty much only able to sit on our asses and watch an endless stream of television while blowing our noses and coughing up our lungs - but that's something I can't do even with my closest friends.
My mom always says absence makes the heart grow fonder (a saying that sounds like nails on a chalkboard to me after hearing it millions of times), but the fact that Brian was away for almost three days while we had the flu made my heart ache as much as the rest of my body. I was lonely (except for the loyal and loving companionship of my beloved beagle) and depressed.
And to top things off, the power went out while Brian was gone...just my luck. Okay, it was only for a total of 30 minutes when I got home from work, but really there's nothing lonelier than being by yourself in the dark. Needless to say, when Brian came home to me and Gordon, stuffy nose, sore throat and all, I couldn't have been happier - I would have jumped on him if I could!
I used to want to be left alone when I was feeling my worst, but now part of the recovery process for me is spending time with the hubby. Well, that and NyQuil...lots and lots of NyQuil.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Trading Sex and the City for Marriage and the Suburbs
When I started watching Sex and the City in seventh grade, I thought I wanted to grow up to be Carrie Bradshaw.
I wanted to be a writer, I wanted to live in Manhattan, and I wanted to have love stories worth telling to the world.
Well, much like my dreams of being a preteen popstar, my dreams of being Carrie Bradshaw didn't quite come true.
What probably changed the course of my wannabe Sex and the City life most was the fact that I met my husband, Brian, during my first weekend of college.
I had envisioned that college would be my coming out period. Coming out as a single girl on the prowl, that is. I even got a head start on the college dating scene by signing up for Facebook and proceeding to friend any guy who was a) cute and b) a freshman at UCI. Turns out what I thought would be the start of my romantic renaissance, filled with a lot of new guys and a lot of new adventures, turned into the beginning of my life with Brian – maybe just one guy, but still plenty of adventures.
I friended him (among many others), he messaged me, we talked until September came around, and then we met the first weekend after school started. Now we're married and although I didn't turn out to be Carrie, I'm pretty damn happy.
But just because I'm not single (and haven't been for over seven years), doesn't mean I don't have stories. Some are about me, some are about my married friends and some are about my single ones (that I enjoy living vicariously through).
It's taken me a while, but I've finally discovered that when it comes to love and relationships, you don't need Sex and the City to make things interesting.
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